Back in the pavilion, the batsman was talking to a team mate. 'I can't understand it,' he said, 'The ball hit my head and the wicket-keeper caught it, but the umpire gave me out’. His friend looked sympathetic. 'Sometimes they go by sound.'
Just before the match, the secretary received a message in his office. There's an umpire down here with two friends. Wants to know if they can come in.'
'No,' replied the secretary , 'the man's obviously lying.'
'How do you make that out?'
'Whoever heard of an umpire with two friends.'
The businessman was talking to his friend on the train home after a hard day.
'What a day I've had,' he said.
'One of the office boys asked for the afternoon off to go to his grandmother's funeral. I thought I was on to him, and went along, too.'
'Good idea,' said his friend. 'How was the match?'
'That's where I lost out. It was his grandmother's funeral!'
The young man was at a dinner party with a pretty girl, but spent the entire evening talking of nothing but cricket. He described all the matches he had played in great detail, how many runs he had scored and so on. Eventually, he stopped and said, 'this must be boring for you, me talking of cricket all the time.'
'Not at all,' she said. 'Tell me, what is cricket?'
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